In my professional life, where I:
-now regularly pretend is like I’m one of those journalists who goes on really in-depth assignment for really long lengths of time,
-take the adage of *try anything once* to a major extreme,
-and live in isolation, on the road for hours a day:
The feeling of failure is starting to creep in.
What if people in my town aren’t interested in preparing their kids for life? There is plenty of evidence that points to my impending failure. Nationally- with TikTok trends pranking kids with scary ‘meet the teacher’ Facetimes, smashing eggs on unsuspecting toddler’s foreheads, throwing cheese (???) in their face.
And one could counter: ‘Sure, sure, crazy attachment parenting lady, it’s just a prank.’ But you watch those egg smash videos and tell me the toddlers aren’t betrayed to their core.
Locally, in the hellscape known as a ‘Facebook mom group’, someone wanted advice on biting:
Thankfully (?) the original poster took the advice of the one mom who suggested a chew toy.
On a more personal note, my toddler gets bit several times a week. From our last incident report:
Honestly, if I have to be on one side of the biting and parenting equation, I'd rather be a victim than instigator because biting, like most savage early childhood behavior is a complex and nuanced situation.
And so I forge on, tend to the unmet needs of my children who aren’t challenged in school, and witness extreme maladaptive behaviors from their peers on a daily basis, express my insecurities in this Substack, and repeatedly listen to Noah Kahan’s Stick Season album during the 2 hours I spend every day in the car because my students all live on opposite ends of the county.
And I also wrote a column for our local paper’s magazine.
I just saw that it came out 2 days ago. Who’s running PR?!
Relatively speaking, there have been a lot of new subscribers, and the article serves as a great recap of issues I’ve discussed in earlier posts.
I’m signing off here. Make sure to Subscribe! Share! Be nice to small children!!
Here is the text, as it appeared in the first “Zero to Five Focus:”
80% of brain growth happens by the age of 3. You read that correctly: 80%! Brain growth and kindergarten readiness are hugely impacted by the experiences of the child and family starting in the prenatal period.
As an elementary teacher and dyslexia specialist, I’ve experienced the huge range in students' readiness to learn. As a parent, I’ve also been overwhelmed by the choices and information available on how to prepare my kids for school and life in general.
A recent study actually found that when parents have too much information, or information that is too complicated to understand, they feel less confident in their parenting. It's a classic case of information overload!
Not only that, but overwhelmed parents are also more likely to still be looking for help on the same question a year later!
So what should we do?
Luckily the answer has nothing to do with a fancy app or private tutor. In fact, the millions of connections being made inside a baby's brain are best made with what is called “conversational turns” or “joint connection.” Which is just a fancy way of saying: talk with your child!
Why talking with infants matters
Researchers at the University of Washington placed voice recorders in the homes of families with infants and toddlers and scanned the child’s brain to track growth in the parts of the brain responsible for language and intelligence.
The amount of back and forth conversations that babies had with caregivers was directly linked to the growth of the language and intelligence brain areas.
The differences in brain growth were seen as young as 6 months old! Long before a baby is even talking. Not only do the differences start early, but they also predict language and intelligence into the teenage years.
Early math skills are also critical
When you think about math, you probably think about equations and geometry. But for infants and toddlers, early math skills are all about understanding the world around them.
Counting, comparing, and other basic skills go a long way to prepare your child for the classroom. And the stakes are high: math skills at kindergarten entry predict math achievement through high school.
It's time to take action
Now more than ever, communities have a responsibility to ourselves and neighbors to celebrate and support families raising young children.
In August, the Texas Legislature failed to include $2.3 billion in child care center funding in the state budget. This money was designed to fill the gap created by an end to COVID funding.
According to the Texas Tribune, "Of the over 1,500 child care programs surveyed by the Texas Association for the Education of Young Children, 44% suggested a likelihood they will close their programs within the next year."
And while the Legislature did approve $35 million for child care subsidies, waitlists for daycares stretch for months to years, so this funding will provide little actual relief for families.
The failure of politicians to support young families is ironic. Nobel-prize winning economist, James Heckman has proven through his research that every $1 invested in prenatal to age 5 public health and education programs provides a $7-13 return on that investment.
Supporting families from pregnancy to kindergarten is quite literally, one of the best financial decisions we can make for our community.
Enter The Basics Parenting Principles
Families are stressed for time, resources, and drained by the overwhelming and conflicting parenting advice available online.
The Basics is a nationwide network of communities who understand the importance of the early years and their impact on school readiness and long-term health outcomes for their youngest citizens.
The Basics are 5 parenting principles based in the brain science of early childhood. It is designed to create an awareness across the community that everyone can help raise our children to become the amazing people we know they can be.
If you know an infant or toddler, The Basics is for you!
The Basics Principles are fun, simple, and powerful
A Little Bit About The Principles
When we think about a child being ready for school, "Maximize Love, Manage Stress" is not the first thing we think of, but feeling secure and having self-control are the foundations of learning and life.
When you "Talk, Sing, and Point" with a child, you are helping form those brain connections that build their vocabulary and increase their intelligence.
"Count, Group and Compare" is all about learning and thinking about the world. It's never too early to ask "how many," talk about shapes, or the location of an object. These are all examples of the math talk that helps your child understand how the world works and prepare them for math class too.
When babies and toddlers "Explore Through Movement and Play" they start school with the confidence to discover new things. Watch your child as they play to see what interests them the most, and encourage them to keep exploring!
"Read and Discuss Stories" helps children become confident thinkers. It is also a great way to relax and connect. With babies and toddlers, don't worry about reading all the words- have fun, point to the pictures, and talk about what you see.
~Abrupt ending~
Because I went on to list the local events I’m doing, which have no relevance here.
There are so many things I love in this post:
-“Perhaps just a metaphor for public school”! Great line - both funny and sobering. My kids were “bitten” many times by teachers and staff in addition to other children.
- The Basics parenting looks great! I have taught parenting workshops, but this is perfect for something quick I can give an overwhelmed parent.
- Regarding biting your child, I can't believe that is still out there! I just saw a post on LinkedIn where a dad announced that he gets his young children to read advanced literature (”Beowulf” was mentioned) by paying them! There were 8-10 affirming comments. Of course, I spoke up about the terrible consequences of this. One parent said I was being ridiculous. It's not a bribe, she said, that's the same as saying paying for college is a bribe. Yikes.
Thank you for this, Laura! You are so right about the need to provide more support for young families. Parents -- and dare I say mothers especially in the early years -- need TIME to spend with their children. Society needs to prioritize and protect that time... Highlighting the benefits of the two-parent family can help, too...https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2023/09/marriage-two-parent-households-socioeconomic-consequences/675333/
Love the principles of parenting graphic!